I swear, I feel like the shittiest person ever every timee I'm around her.
She makes me feel like I commited the worst crimee ever.
Like I freaking killed a babyy or somethingg.
And I try,
I try so damned hard to let her know that I still love her.
And I'm still here for her.
And, that I am so sorry.
Because I really am.
I hatee that I hurt her.
4 thoughts:
I think she is still extremely heart broken over what happened. She called me multiple times crying because she felt so lost... you left her in a hole and she couldn't climb out. You can't make everything about you, you need to remember that you have a beautiful little sister that needs you to LEAD HER. How would you feel if she turned 19 and pulled all the stuff you are? You wouldn't be a happy sister.
That's how she feels. She is heartbroken. Don't apologize for what you did, ask how you can make it better.
So, that last comment was uncalled for, and I will completely understand if you're mad at me for a while.
But, thats how I was feeling. I was upset. Because I have tried to make it better. I have tried to talk to her. There was one day I was over there and tried talking to her and she just sat there and played with her ipod and when I asked if she wanted to talk she just blew me off. I'm hurt too, and she doesn't seem to notice what she is doing is just as bad. I mean, that one post a little while back about marissa and me? that was just RUDE.
and, I know she is beautiful and amazing. I wrote on her fb wall and told her that one day not to long ago.
I just felt so betrayed when I read those things she wrote about me.
i know your hurt and stuff ,
but that was my way of going about my feelings. that wasnt rude, that was my feelings.
i'm not trying to blow you off i just dont know what to talk about anymore.
you and i talked just last night.
you gotta understand that things cant just go back to the way they used to in three seconds because you left him.
i'm sorry too and i love you sissy.
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